SUGGESTION FROM A FAN TO FEDERER's OPPONENTS

MIRKA should make a proposal to the top fifty players to submit 25% of their annual incomes to her BOYPRIEND, who will then, in return, not play at any tournament for the next two years! He would, in that case, still remain Number One because nobody would overtake him anyway, and some of them would have a decent opportunity to win something and improve their portfolios.

Players ranked prom 50 - 200 should pay a fixed fee to Federer's family anytime they watch one of his matches.

I suspect ATP might issue a ruling that Federer must play with only half tension on his racket; that his left shoe must have glass on it's sole, and also that he is not allowed to serve! Also, his opponents should be allowed to use outside lines reserved for doubles game while he must perform on a normal singles court.

A Fan

 

TENNIS JOKES

Q: What is the definition of endless love?

A. Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis

*****

The Tennis Player's Prayer

Please don't let me be so nervous
When I toss the ball for service.

Give me speed and strength unhaulting,
Aces and no double-faulting.

Instill in me the skill and dash
Of Agassiie, Williams, Roddick and Ashe.

When a high lob starts to fall,
Must I always miss the ball?

Lord, I know you could, I'm sure,
Find me a Tennis Elbow cure.

With the guidance from above,
Never let me fall in 'love.'

And, Lord, while on matters of this sort
Please let me find an open court!

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